Thursday, September 27, 2012

Transition - The changes From SAHM to FTWM

After staying at home for 2 years, I have been searching for jobs inactively. After searching for 1 year, it is only just recently, I have got a job interview. Now I am having a mixture of feelings.

Being SAHM

I like being SAHM, watch my girl grow and reached her milestones. I want to transfer my own value to her, makes her feel loved. Being SAHM can be also be demanding, physically and mentally. I had my fair shares of sleepless nights and always feeling tired. I find now the most challenging part is to discipline a child, it can totally drain your energy emotionally and mentally. It is a heartache to see her cry but yet the child must not be spoilt. And yet sometimes, I find myself turning into a monster which I do not recognise. Then I will feel extremely guilty for exploding like that.

Looking for jobs

With financial burden growing heavy and a housing loan to pay for, I had to find myself a job, preferably a part time one where I can work half a day and stay at home after that. But these jobs is not readily available. I tried to find one that is near my area but I can't seem to get an interview from anywhere.

When I finally got an interview, it is actually though a friend's recommendation, I went for it. It's a full time job working in the city, quite near but some travelling is required.

Now that I have accepted the job offer.


I am wondering whether I had made the right decision. If  I were to put little one in full day will there be someone who would help me discipline her and instill the right value when she did wrong? Will she feel that she is not being loved enough? Then, what if we could not fetch her on time? Also, we may have to dine out more often. Otherwise, we might search through this website and order from the stated restaurant if we could not cook. (I still prefer home cooked food. =X) Over these few days, I have been wondering whether I am up to the mark although I have not started on my job yet. I have not been working for 3 years. Will I be able to adapt to my new life after being stagnant for 3 years?


Now that I had already signed the contract, I guess I just have to make it work and see how it goes.
Little one has been experiencing her full day routine staggeredly. I am amazed that she has been taking it well. She is able to nap in school and all without a fuss.

I have to make adjustment to her routine before school. Nowadays no more home made breakfast. Little one is still taking her own sweet time to go to school. I think in order for me to arrive on time, I guess I have no choice but to dress her up myself and also to carry her all the way to the bus stop as I do not want to wake her up early at 630am to do ask her do every thing herself. I had timed, if she do everything herself, I took 2 hours to prepare her and reach work place at 830am. If I do it for her, I'll take 1hr15 min to reach work place. I guess that is the best I can do. I guess I could only now afford to train her walk faster by herself when we are going home.

I also start to prepare myself by doing household chores in the evening so that I will not be in total transition shock when my job starts. As for home cooked food, I guess it will probably be steaming most of the time if we really do not have the time to cook.

These few days, I do see changes in my home. It is neater because little one is not around most of the time and I made her keep her toys before she sleeps. Lesser time were spent on home schooling. I practically find myself preparing food for dinner and doing the laundry the moment we step home.

If you are a FTWM, how do you prepare your child each day and how to you prepare your meals in the evening? Is there any fast and nutritious recipe to share? Please share your tips..


  1. Oh Lilium, it's not an easy decision. Either way we sacrifice something and we just need to try making up for it. A lot of Americans here take out food or eat out during the weekday. But then kids (and you) don't eat as nutritious meal as your home cooked meal and you often end up with battling with picky eaters. But who has time to cook... I think it's very generic suggestion, but "planning" ahead is the only way it will work. Before the week starts, you must know what to cook and prepare everything ahead (shopping and some prep work). So when you come home, you can just toss everything (stir fry?) and it's done. Or some people here use crockpot to cook. When there is no plan, it's hard to come up with something. Planning ahead can be a challenge though. Good luck! You will get used to it and figure it out. :)

    1. Nami, thanks for the suggestions! I am quite worried about bringing up a picky eater! I will plan for the week and probably have to pick up some cooking skills from you!

  2. Hi Lilium, I can imagine that the transition will take a bit of time to get use to, but I'm sure you and your girl will adapt to it! Since you've decided to make the switch back to full-time working mom, do your best to make it work. But if in the end you realise it doesn't, it's ok. There will always be options, such as finding another job that has better working hours, or maybe a part-time job or even to work from home as a freelancer or to run your own business :)

    About the meals, you can use a slow cooker and make soups. Just prepare the ingredients the night before and cook them the next morning before you go to work. Or you can make stews using a thermal cooker (it's a worthwhile 'investment'). Same thing - prepare ingredients the night before and cook it the next morning :)

    All the best to you as you go back to being a FTWM! Jiayou!

    1. Thank you, Ruth, for your encouragement! I think we may invest on a pressure cooker.


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